I AM WOMAN?

Did they really, honestly play "I Am Women" for Katheryn Bigelow's Best Director Oscar win tonight?

Why yes.  Yes they did.

Congratulations, Helen Reddy.  My condolences to anyone else in the 21st century who thought we were in the 21st century.

DRUNK HULK BRING THE FUNNY!

If you aren't following @DRUNKHULK on Twitter, you're missing the entire reason Twitter is fabulous.


One-hundred-forty characters of grammatically unsound/on-target ramblings from an oversized green humanoid never sounded so good.


Por ejemplo?  Hulk fan glad you asked.

• AVATAR IN 4D IN KOREA! FOR FIRST TIME! LUCKY VIEWER ABLE TO WALK THROUGH PLOT HOLE!

• DRUNK HULK BE MORE INTEREST IN GHOST WRITER IF HAD GHOST DIRECTOR!

Show the intoxicated gamma-man some love ~ you not be sorry.


(P.S. I just joined Twitter, so if there's extra love in your heart after Hulk takes a big bite, follow me @LolaHeatherton. Thanks!)

The Daily Show: Bank of America has some nice dresses for you, Karen

Absolute brilliance ensues at the :50 second mark of this clip.

John Stewart encapsulates how credit card companies find more creative ways to screw their customers than Xaviera Hollander. *rimjob*/*rimshot*

Then Wyatt Cenac talks with a former Bank of America employee to discuss how B of A is worse than the mafia.

Really.

He talks to a former mafia loan shark. Turns out the Bank of America has some beautiful Dior dresses for you, just around the corner. Go ahead.

The Daily Show With Jon Stewart	Mon - Thurs 11p / 10c
Make it Rain - Bank of America
www.thedailyshow.com
Daily Show Full Episodes Political Humor Health Care Crisis

The Daily Show, "Make It Rain", February 23

Hair is a Never-Ending Subject

Madam(e), I'm Adam

Happy Birthday, Corky St. Clair!

I adore birthday boy Christopher Guest.

Why?

Hope For Haiti Telethon Uses New Media

The "Hope for Haiti Now" telethon is using new media to become one of the most widely-broadcast events in history. Find out how online streaming, iTunes and mobile broadcast will help reach a massive global audience and raise money for Haitian earthquake relief.

Hope for Haiti Telethon Uses New Media: Event for Earthquake Relief Broadcast Online, Via Mobile & iTunes

Hope for Haiti Now (January 22) will be one of the most widely-broadcast events in history, thanks to online streaming, mobile distribution, iTunes, & dozens of networks.

Dear Alex & Annie...

I'm desperate! What should I do? In these troubled times, our nation could use a hit of Dear Alex & Annie. Not a child of the 70's? Didn't watch upwards of 6 hours of television each Saturday before hitting the pool? It is my honor to school you in the ways of Double A.

CLIFF'S NOTES:

Two youngish summer-stockers looking for work come upon an ad:

Noted specialist in child psychology needs unthreatening, kind of telegenic hosts to serve as mouthpieces to improve shabby pre-teen lives through laughter and song. Ability to shoot real sincere glances at the camera a must.

Thousands would enter. Two would win.

Beginning at approximately 57 seconds into the clip, you'll discover the inspiration for Disney's smash hit "The Princess & The Frog". From acorns, my friends. From acorns.

And they get as good as they give! "That's not very 'riginal," Annie chides Alex when he attempts to form his own thoughts. Proving that what's good for pre-teen geese is good for the gander.

Oh, Dear Alex & Annie,

We need you more than ever!

Americans need your pat advice,

All animated and clever.

So, tie on that bandana!

Buy some mousse! Blow dry!

Flat-chested girls across our land

Need your help to land a guy.

Faye Dunaway's Sitcom

Faye Dunaway had a sitcom.

It's like discovering that Ruth Bader Ginsberg spiked a mean volleyball in her forgotten, big-boned youth.  Or that Aretha Franklin twisted balloon dachshunds as a party clown.

"It Had To Be You" lasted for about one month in 1993, and it seems just right that Robert Urich also starred.

Delicious recipe for 4-episode success?

3/4 cup Dunaway as publishing big-wig
1/2 cup blue-collar Urich
3 blue-collar kids from previous marriage
1 tsp awkward chemistry
1 Tbsp Gumption of Dunaway

Stir until agents are nearly fired.

Notice the discomfort in your lower chakras as you attempt to internally resolve the incongruity of Faye Dunaway and a laugh track.

Bonnie Franklin Taps Her Way Into America's Heart

"Julie!" ~ Bonnie Franklin, One Day At a Time

Fact: Bonnie Franklin loves to tap.  "Maple trees?  That ass?" you may ask.  No!  Tap dance!

And, I'll let you in on a little secret: Bonnie Franklin hates to exercise.  I know these things because I read the cover of her DVD, "I Hate to Exercise, I Love to Tap, starring Bonnie Franklin".

Out of 74 customer reviews on Amazon, this gem of a video has received 66 five-star reviews!  From people who aren't being snarky!  So, it seems she is a legit triple threat: acting, dancing, sassy.  God bless her perky-but-had-it-up-to-here heart.

You can own it.  You should own it. Own it.